As I finished my morning yoga practice, I wanted to drift back to dream world as my partner is sleeping in on this lovely day. I instantly felt this flow of thought of how I have yogis all around me in their many forms. Yogis of non-judgment. Those that simply Be. The connection was made when I was attempting to sleep some more, and I thought about the first Thanksgiving where my mother and younger brother are joining me at my new family's home. My in laws Judi and Mark were so kind to invite us all to their home as the last few years have been at my younger brothers apartment. Imagining introducing my family to my family, I recalled sweet Dixie, my mother in laws sister's tattoo about love on her arm. I couldn't recall the exact words in that moment, and yet I remember when I asked at the last gathering what it said she repeated the words, and then looked deep within me to say that I love you no matter how many tattoos you have. The Truth she spoke as an older woman who got her first pieces of body art later in life and who is showing up as a yogi of non-judgment made me so thankful. Then I thought man, what a pair! I am so blessed with a mother in law who also practices non judgment and shows up as love. A very hands off approach to her granddaughters mothering showed me this a few gatherings a go. I am so blessed to have such a mentality around me :)
And this then led me to feel inspired to encourage others to practice non-judgment. Today can be a challenging day for some due to many circumstances as we gather with loved ones or even gather with those that maybe we don't love so much due to obligation. (that is not my case yet I know for some it is) So I want to say be the yogi of non-judgment. Practice Svadhyaya- self study, non-judgement. What is that you may ask? Its within one of the limbs of yoga called the niyamas, or daily practices, and within that branch there are other dynamics one of which is Svadhyaya- self study, non-judgement.
I have been recently taking on svadhaya as a self love practice.
Those who judge others are most likely judging themselves, hard. So take a look within and see if you have the capacity to breathe, to take that extra moment to allow yourself to drop the story you are creating or that they have created. Have compassion and turn on your listening ears. What are they really saying? Are they hurting and in need of love? I like to visualize love bubbles around people. This is something I learned from another amazing teacher in my life, she is also a yogi of non judgment. Love bubbles make me feel good because its a fun way to pray for them, and really you cant think reactive thoughts of you are visualizing a love bubble around them and around yourself. Metaphysically speaking, it also helps with any leaking energetic boundaries you may experience from certain people in your life and its nice to watch them shift. I have experienced instant changes in a peoples tones and what they are even saying sometimes literally stops with a "what was I saying?" as it didn't align with love.
Make your Thanksgiving fun. Show up as Love, Compassion, and Gratitude. Practice Love Bubbles :)
Outside of the what to do on Thanksgiving here are some other recent insights into my healing journey:
I had a coaching call recently where I was told that 'shoulds', 'woulds' 'have to', and 'musts' are all forms of judgement. BING! The light bulb went off. I have known I shouldn't 'should' on myself, and I have been listening to what it feels like or what the should is saying, identifying the should as "false choice" based off of another teachers guidance in a Self Development class I participated in massage school. Yet never had I seen such words as me judging myself. Another piece of the puzzle I was given in my recent call was that "if I could have done better I would have done better" . That brought peace to my past.
I talked through how I wish I would have been more present when my dad was sick as I was out partying to feel bliss instead of the immense sadness that I pushed away from enveloping me for years. I constantly felt this guilt and shame like 'I should have been there' and 'I should have stayed home more.' 'I should have had more time with him and I chose to drink and do coke. WOAH TRUTH BOMB! I never thought I would speak of this chapter of my life or share that part of my story online, and yet I am done editing out the parts that have made me me. The 'shoulds' even want to win right now like, 'I shouldn't post this online' and "what will people think" and "am I jeopardizing clients?" DONT LET FEAR WIN! the Inner Voice says!
I will be cocaine free for 2 years as of March 2020. A substance I know I will never use again. And I made that choice all by myself knowing I wanted to honor my vessel and create a better environment for mySelf and my future.
Yet heres the thing, I would be lying to myself and others if I didn't show up as my authentic self, and that includes my past. Everyone has a past and today I want to be a reminder that people can and do change that we can harbor good within ourselves and the world. Sometimes people are doing the best they can at the time with the knowledge they have or the programs they have been given. I suppose one of my programs is loving to share, maybe I share too much, maybe I share just enough. Enough to inspire and guide to allow you all a glimpse into my life to understand that I believe in you. In your past giving you all the pieces of the puzzle that you will need to create the Masterpiece of your Life and the Divine intended. As cliché as it may sound, everything will make sense one day.
I am advocate for change. I am an advocate for love. I am an advocate for an authentic life where we all show up as our best selves, and love each other on the days when we maybe play a bit less than our best Self.
Today show up as love, today show up as non judgment. Be the yogi that you are and Shine!